You have probably heard the scripture before, “Be Still and KNOW that I am God” (Psalm 46:10).
I know I have, but in this most recent season my understanding of this verse has changed dramatically. I realize now that I didn’t truly understand those words. I thought that they sounded great and that the whole idea of this verse was encouraging, but they only ever entered my mind, not my soul. That is, until recently.
This last year has been a year of transition. Many areas of my life have changed and transformed in ways I never thought they would. My life looks very different than the plans and purposes I had set out for myself. The biggest part of my life that has been rocked has been my relationship with the Lord, ultimately for the better.
What I didn’t realize was that for the last 7 years I had been living from a place of “doing.” In fact, my entire relationship with the Lord functioned around my “doing.” I truly felt and did out of this desperate place of having to “do” to please the Lord and people. I thought if I ‘do’ more I would ‘be’ more. Oddly enough, I never connected the dots and I was only ever left feeling not good enough and completely exhausted. All this ‘doing’ never seemed to work, I didn’t realize there was another way to live.
I can remember many moments over the years sitting before the Lord, frantically pleading and begging him to tell me what I needed to do: to feel him, to be closer to him and to please him. Not only with him but with people as well. Looking back, I realized I never got an answer. I would do all that I knew to do and walk away half-empty.
Fast forward to the last few months. God’s grace and love is just too good.
In this new season of transition the Lord has not allowed me to continue living out of ‘doing.’ In fact, he called me away from everything that connected me to living from a place of ‘doing’ so that I can ‘just be’.
Initially, when I started moving forward in all the transition, I tried to still function from that place of ‘doing,’ but it no longer fit in the new season God had placed me in. I actually started experiencing a physical, emotional, mental and spiritual (the whole sha-bang) breakdown. My body couldn’t get out of bed, couldn’t clean, couldn’t cook. My emotions were uncontrollable and my mind spiraled into dark and desperate places. I no longer could handle the pressure, expectations and opinions that myself and others had placed on me. I had to stop. I had to rest. I had to just be.
Earlier this year I had determined to read the entire Bible in a year. I was so proud of my goal and felt that I would be considered a “legit” and “mature” Christian to have read the entire bible in a year… ha (eyes rolling emoji)! While God was moving me from “doing” to “being,” I sat there one morning feeling guilty for how behind I was on my Bible plan and anxiety entered my heart. As I was reaching for my Bible to try to catch up, I had a vision. Jesus was sitting across from me with his hand on my Bible looking into my eyes with love and acceptance. I heard him say to me “my love, just be.” I pulled back from reaching for my Bible and I sat there. I didn’t know what to do but I decided to put worship music on and let the words wash over me. It felt uncomfortable at first. I struggled with feeling empty and free all at the same time.
The following days I continued to sit on my floor with worship music playing in the background. I didn’t do anything but simply ‘be.’ After a few weeks, the Lord started showing me why I can and should “just be” before him. He started revealing my true identity and how Jesus’ death and resurrection already took care of everything I was trying to accomplish.
I, You, We, can “just be” because Jesus Christ already did the work for us. Through his life, death, and resurrection he removed the separation between us and our Heavenly Father so we can now come boldly before him (Hebrews 4:16). We are now free from the “law of Moses” aka “works and doing” to live in free and intimate relationship with the Lord. We don’t have to do a thing to be loved, accepted and good enough for God. That is why Jesus was the ultimate sacrifice. He cleansed us, redeemed us and FREED us.
The word says it beautifully in Colossians 1:22-23: “Yet now he has reconciled you to himself through the death of Christ in his physical body. As a result, he has brought you into his own presence, and you are holy and blameless as you stand before him without a single fault. But you must continue to believe this truth and stand firmly in it. Don’t drift away from the assurance you received when you heard the Good News.”
Simply said, the Lord sees us as daughters who are holy, blameless and without a single fault, not because of anything we have done or need to do, but because of what Jesus did.
Let’s be women who refuse to live from a place of striving, performing and doing to find value, purpose and love. Let’s start “just being” the women that God sees us as; valued, loved and free.